Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life. Show all posts

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

To the young me and you

It's been too long since I posted on this blog and I'm not really sure if anyone is reading this. But if you do, thank you for being there.

A lot has changed about me and about my life. I will share more what happened at work and the path I chose to take soon. But for now, I want to write a blog dedicated to my old, young self. I have been so  focused on what the future will be and didn't even thank the young me.

The young me was self-centered, stubborn and always felt she was alone. Yes, maybe because growing up, my parents is not really with me all the time. It took awhile for the old me to accept and understand that. But growing up without parents, taught that little girl to be independent, to stand for decisions, even break some rules and take responsibility for it.

I didn't have too many friends even before because my Grandparents protected me too much. I am not allowed to play outside and go with random people which helped me now... Living alone is not that hard to do. I don't depend my happiness on friends. I don't need the assurance of anyone to make myself better. I enjoy the company of the small circle of friends that I truly keep inside my heart but, at the same time, I enjoy me times. I can sit all day dreaming, watching TV series, reading or just bumming around. It's a talent but of course, we have things to do in life so let's keep moving.

The young and in love me is also the reason why I am still single now. She was heartbroken, reprimanded to entertain boys (which, I now know why I shouldn't), and hoped too much. Young love, sweet love and the kilig I get from side stares at the hallways of the school. The meant to be dance partners as if the stars aligned. I go back, close my eyes to the feelings and it was maybe 2002 again... Those made me believe that true love is on its way, to never lose hope and destiny will find the older me.

And finally, thanks to the young me who tried and tried and tried. I guess I'm the type who never really get it the first time or maybe even the second try but what matters is I get to achieve it at some point. Trying, hard work and positivity that one day, some day I will get it. I guess, we don't really get what we want because when we already got it  there's already a new goal or another dream waiting on the line... These things keep us on the ground to make us keep on trying.

Thanks to the young me for loving to live and who made this life worth living. You deserve where you are now.

Monday, October 25, 2010

For Well Heeled People, Places, Passion...Fashion!

First, answer this QUIZ.
Sassy Slip-on
Sassy Slip-on quiz
You're the Sassy type! No matter what you don't let anyone trample over you! You are independent and no one's second choice, go girl!

And this ONE too.



the love of high heels quiz
Your Result: Heel Diva
You have a true love for the look, feel, affection and experience of high heels. You read the magazines and look for the latest fashions on tv. You find it hard to walk through the mall without taking a look at the heels being offered. If you could you would possibly shop for heels weekly if you don't already. The higher and sexier the better in a lot of cases but not the law for you. You are intrigued by those who admirer your heel appeal and experience joy when you see others intrigued by your wearing your heels! You cannot remember a week without have worn heels.
Heel Fetish
Heel Lover
Heel Admirer
Heel
the love of high heels quiz
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz


There are different kinds of shoes for different occasions and people. I love heels and among my favorites are the wedges and cone heels. 


What about you? What are your favorites among these?


Different Women Shoe Styles
Ankle Straps




An ankle strap shoe has one or multiple straps that, as the very name suggests, fasten around the ankle. Straps can include laces, ribbons and other material to wrap around the lower part of the leg.




Ballet Flats
Also known as ballerina flats, the ballet flats have been inspired from ballet shoes and have become useful for women of all shapes and sizes. A ballet flat is a flat heeled, enclosed shoe, almost like a slipper. It is easy to slip on and is available in different designs and shapes, with beads, jewels, fringes and flowers.

Kitten Heels

Kitten heels have a thin-based low heel that tapers sharply to a narrow base. The heel is usually 1.5 inches or less and is slightly set in from the back of the shoe. These shoes combine comfort with a little bit of extra height and go well with most outfits.

French Heels

French heels are shoes with a medium height, having a curved heel that is somewhat chunkier than a Kitten heel.

Mary Janes

A Mary Jane reminds you of your school days, as it is like the round-toed, low-heeled shoe that children wear to school. A distinctive feature of Mary Jane is the single or double strap that crosses the middle top of the foot. It comes in varying heights and styles.

Mules

A mule is covered in the front, just like a normal shoe and the back is open. It is easy to slip on and comes in various heights and different heel shapes.

Pumps

Pumps are low cut shoes that surround the foot without any fastenings. They are available in leather, micro fiber and other fabrics.

Peep Toes

A peep toes shoe is open at the tip of the toes, to show part of the toes, but not the whole toe line. The opening of the shoe is small and rounded or wedge shaped.

Platform Shoes

Platform shoes are thick soles that sit under the front part of the foot and are combined with wedges, chunky heels or stilettos. They are known as platform wedges, when they are combined with a wedge heel.

Sandals

Sandals are shoes with open toes and backs, with single or multiple straps for fastening. A number of sandal designs are available, depending on the type and material of straps and height of heels.

Sling-backs

Sling backs are a cross between a mule and a full shoe. They have a strap that connects the sides and back to the front of the shoe, instead of a closed back. They come in varying heights and can have open toes or a fully closed front.

Stiletto Heels

Stilettos or spiked heels refer to high heels that are pointy and thin. The slender and very feminine heels can be as high as 6 inches.

Wedge Heels

A wedge is based on the same shape as a triangular door-stop. The heel extends from the back of the shoe to right under the foot, thus running in a wedge shape from back to front. Wedges come in different heights.

Oh, there's alway a room
for another pair of shoes!!!



love, now and always, 

Saturday, October 23, 2010

Of Heels, Men Wearing Heels And Other Heels Story!


I remember wearing heels as early as 11 years old. It's a black one, platform sandals, about 2.5 inches high… It kinda looks like this, but what I have has a thicker heel support. 



I also remember that no one taught me or told me to wear heels; mom is certainly not into this kind of things. Anyways, I just wore one to imitate Barbie and, of course, so that I wouldn’t step the bottom of my longer-than-my-height jeans.

I love wearing heels, even if it makes my feet tired and uncomfortable. Also, whenever I wear one, it makes me look very lady-like. Plus, the level of confidence it gives me is overwhelming… Imagine! I’m 3-inch-higher!


Some HIStory:


High heels originated in France around 1500s as male’s footwear. In the late 18th century, men’s heel shoes are designed lower with the exception of the cowboy boots.[Note: REAL cowboy boots are 2 inches high!]


Cuban Heels are also extremely popular to men for bands, rock groups and stars like The Beatles, John Travolta, etc. Only goes to show that heels are not just for us, ladies. Other artists that wear heels are Elton John, Bands such as Mötley Crüe and Sigue Sigue Sputnik and, now,  the lead singer of Tokio Hotel is wearing… wedges!

Why do Men love High Heels on Women?


There are many reasons to love heels, even if a man doesn’t have a shoe fetish. Even heels are difficult to be worn over a long period of time, women like wearing heels for it enhances attractiveness to the male specie.

Reasons:
Wearing heels highlights the feminine form.
Women’s hips sways involuntarily when wearing heels.
Women’s legs appear longer in Heels.
Heels makes a woman appear few inches taller.
Women in heels are vulnerable, being in heels makes the ladies unable to move or escape easily and quickly.

But do men really notice heels?

Researchers from  Northumbria University studied the reactions of men to women walking in heels and flats. Men were asked to observe women, between 18 and 35, walk without seeing their shoes. However, Men weren't able to distinguish between a woman walking in sensible flats and height-altering heels.

Well, it’s really up to you, Ladies. I wear heels for confidence, for additional height, for aesthetics. But, still, TRUE BEAUTY is inside. If wearing heels makes you feel beautiful and powerful, GO! Just don’t wear it for the sake of getting the attention of the opposite sex.

love, now and always, 

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Call Me Names






It's been a childhood dream to change my name to something shorter. Oh, not just as a child, I always dream of changing my name. In fact, every time that I am asked to tell them something about myself, I always tell them that if given a chance or if it is possible, I want my name to change my name to something girly. For one, I really wanted to follow the MARIA of my mother's name. 



Alexzandria Garnett is one of my girl dream names. I got this name from Final Fantasy IX. It's a game, a role playing game. This game happened in Alexandria and one of the most lovable character there is Garnett--the princess.


If I were a boy, I 'd like my name to be... Aethan Rafael. It is so masculine, sounds so good and and so unique. If I have that name and someone will call me, it feels like, I'm brave, a strong and knight in shining armor.

If I could choose my name... but I couldn't and I wouldn't because it's a gift to me. My name is precious and as I grow older, through the years I learned to love and treasure it. I know my name now is the sweetest word ever said, especially, when it is heard by my parents. Anyway, my dream names are not wasted... I will name them to my future children. 


love, now and always, 

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Of Ten Things



I don't have a favorite number. But if I should choose one I'll go for number 10. One, it's easy to remember and two the tenth letter in the alphabet is J--the first letter of my name.

Today is 10-10-10, The Tenth Day Of The Tenth Month Of The Tenth Year Of The Decade... I should have for this day... got married, bought a new car or a house, adopted a pet, spent the day with an orphanage or something. Kidding aside, I should've bought a plane ticket and spent the day with you...!



Ten Things to be Thankful:
  1. I'm still alive
  2. I'm living a peaceful life
  3. I have a job [not the one that I really like thought but it still supports me]
  4. I passed UP again [FYI, I passed 3 years ago but wasn't able to really enroll]
  5. My mom's operation is successful [Thanks God!]
  6. My brother is back in our family [The bitch is gone... Yes! I can say that it's my blog! RIGHT?!]
  7. Marco, Julianne, Tito Pogs and Tita Irma visited us [and we'll be visiting them soon... hello USA]
  8. My knee is not aching so much anymore [but I still have to visit the doctor for final check ups] 
  9. I don't have any debts
  10. I have a clear goal of what I want.

Ten things to look forward:
  1. Grad school
  2. FilmFest Competition Level Up! Live
  3. Halloween, Christmas, New Year
  4. Holidays
  5. Reunion with my MF friends
  6. Family out of town[probably somewhere far... CEBU? BOHOL? BORA?]
  7. Wearing heels again[after the accident]
  8. Shopping [when's the last time i bought something for myself.. for myself only]
  9. E.L.F. 100+ eye shadow palette will be out in the market next month
  10. My Christmas for a cause project.


Ten Things to Achieve/Learn:
  1. Play chess
  2. Swim good
  3. Ride a bike
  4. Finish my MA
  5. Transfer to a new job[that's really right for my course]
  6. Take Image Nation workshop
  7. Join lots of  Writing competitions
  8. Give more time to family
  9. Give myself a "Me" time
  10. Update my Journal regularly


Ten Things to Stop:
  1. Sleeping late
  2. Ignoring txt messages
  3. Spending too much  
  4. Cursing people
  5. Hating _______.
  6. Being nice to not so nice people
  7. Giving out my fake smile
  8. Skipping Doctor appointments 
  9. Skipping Breakfast
  10. Acting like an evil person... [it was fun when people look at me differently, though]




love, now and always, 

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Man Made

I can’t swim. I can’t play chess. I can’t sing. I can’t draw. I suck at dancing. I actually suck with any kind of ball sports. I often mispronounce words. I usually miss my turn and stop when driving.

These are some of the things I can’t...

But there are also things I believe I took the spotlight...

Like making you smile. Inventing a new dessert, sweet yet sugar free. Transforming your super bad mood to happiness and bliss.

I'm also a good stalker, observer, lover. Omit the last word.

Every man is made equal.

1 out of the 10 people I've met told me they hate essay or writing. 1 out of the 10 people I knew treated me like a God, when they discovered I'm a writer. 1 out of the people I knew thinks a writer is a person who knows everything and is very very geek. YAY!

Sorry to these '1 out of 10 people'--I'm imperfect.

I don't know how to play chess, ride a bike and swim a river. Most of the time, it takes me a century to solve a real hard math problem. There are a lot of things I can't...


Man Made Equal

There are things I do better than the rest but that doesn't make me any perfect. We are diamonds, of different cuts, of different shades, shapes and sizes, and definitely, we shine on our way.

Writing is where I'm good at. 

But you have your own spot in the light too. You may not know it on the spur of the moment. But one day, someday, that spot will shine itself to fame.

love, now and always,
 

Monday, August 9, 2010

The story that ended happily

Yesterday, I saw my ex- fiancé. Yes, the one that I planned my whole life with two years ago.

To be exact, we broke up January 31, 2008. It was a really bad breakup. I have to say that if our story was a movie—it would win all possible dramatic awards and of course, I’d be the best actress of all time.

If I remembered it correctly, I cried every single day after we broke up and I only stopped in the middle of March. When I say every single day, I really mean everyday... Not a day would pass without weeping over him. Here’s a trivial: I used to have this film canister where I store all my tears for him and wish that by the time I already filled the canister, I’m done crying. But halfway full the canister, I stopped. Thank God.

I remember writing a future letter to him @ futureme.org that will be sent 5 years from the date of our break up. The letter wasn’t anything cheesy. It was actually telling him to look for me and to be friends with me after all. But only 2 years passed and we are ok.

I’m even glad now that I experienced that kind of pain.

So… I saw my ex fiancé. I thought it would still hurt or it would like strum a string in my heart but it did not. I have finally moved on. I am finally free.

We had a lil catching up. He asked a lot of things about me and I answered all of it.

Perhaps, he was worried. Maybe, he still feels guilty about the break up.

Here are our random chat:

Your hair’s still long…
If you only knew I cut it really short.

You still write…
Yes and this is serious writing. I bid freelance goodbye.

You wear higher heels now…
That makes me taller than you. c",)

You have a boyfriend…
I don’t but there’s someone that’s trying to change my status.

I didn’t ask too much about him. All I asked was how’s he doing and how his parents are and I'm grateful they are all okay. I didn’t bother to ask a lot of things: One, I’m not interested and two, I don’t want to send a wrong signal.

Really, time heals all wounds. Two years ago isn’t a very long time and I’m healed. Your heart might be breaking right now, but always see the little light that shines around you.

Hold on tight, it will be one hell of a journey. There will be a lot of pain, crying, heartaches, learnings….

Remember to never give up because the story isn’t over yet.

And if you ever feel like giving up... just think about this...

Don’t you want to see your story ending happily?

love, now and always,



Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Of life and Pain

Stucked in the computer monitor for awhile.
Tap, tap, tap, type… stop.
Backspace, save, escape.
Type again.
Alt f4… save.
Cancel.
No, I shouldn’t give up.

I should blog, type the thoughts in my mind now or it will be gone forever.

Today is a beautiful day. I realized how unlucky I am to live in this world. How I need air to live. How I need water, food, clothing, shelter to survive.

How I need friends to laugh with, be with. How I have to talk to mom about life-love-life problems. How I need my brother’s alarm clock every morning. How I… need this, need that, want this, want that….
There are lots of things I need to be able to live. How unlucky I am to need that. But at the same time lucky…. Because I’m still alive.

Weird?

I wanted to die yesterday and now realized that I love to live, hundreds, thousands of century…That every single breathe I take, every beat of my heart, every blink of my eye, every pulse, signs me that I’m still living. That these heartaches wounds deep now, but will later heal its own. That scars of pain doesn’t matter now, for surgeries are left, right, down, under.

Maybe I’m living too much that I couldn’t feel it anymore. Living’s been perfect in the days that gone. No problem, no challenge… just alive. Maybe God would want another twist, he’s bored and saturated with my perfect life.

Now, he’s back to attack for more fighting. He’s back for some action. Anyway, a hero wouldn’t be a hero without some villain. But he wouldn’t send terrorist in front of me like he how he bombed off WTC. He wouldn’t trap me in a broken elevator. He wouldn’t break my shoes, steal my phone. He wouldn’t send a fire-mad boss. He wouldn’t touch, push, hurt a family and a friend…

He would break a heart, my heart… to mend, make it stronger—to feel pain is to live—to be alive.
love, now and always,
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Sunday, June 28, 2009

Mommy, I love you, you know...


“Papa, pano na tayo?” –Joshua Meneses, 6 years old.


Could this be true? As I type each letter of this blog post, I still hope that somewhere in the middle and before I submit this post, I would wake up in the reality—that it’s all a dream—my Grand Mother is still alive.

I was just being close to her, spending a holiday with her in Singapore.

I was just with her exploring SG.


I was just flying back home with her here to Philippines.

I was just starting to feel her. She was just starting to feel me.

And now she’s gone.




All my younger years, I was brought up by my grand grand mother, Inang. I live with her, spent most of my childhood with her and loved her more than anyone else in this world.


I never had the chance to be closer to my grand mother, Mommy. Even if she lives in the house next to ours, I seldom talk to her. All I know, way back, is that she hates my family, Mama particularly.


But as I grew older, I realized that, “that’s just the way it goes.” Mommy isn’t the open one. She’s too private. She keeps things by herself. She’s full of surprises. She’s totally unpredictable. You’ll hate her at times; you’ll love her all the time. You will think you perfectly know her, but then again, you don’t. That’s how Mommy is.


She’s too strong. She cries all the time. Her tears easily flow down her cheeks. But when she cries, she’s not hurting. She never really tells it when she’s really in pain.


“It feels cold here now. Nararamdaman ko nandito ka Mommy.”


I never thought that I would be closer to here. I thought, “it’ll be just like that for life.” I’m happy that I surprised her in her 70th birthday. I’m glad I was able to spend a vacation with her. I was given a chance to be closer to her and I’m glad I didn’t waste it.


I’m glad I opened up myself to her and she shared herself to me. I’m glad that I was able to cook her breakfast, walk with her around Singapore, advised her about what make up, clothes, bag, etc. suit her.


I’m glad she thought me how to cook Sinigang… that I haven’t cooked ever since she thought me. I’m glad she told me stories of her life. I’m thankful she cooked for my birthday. I thankful she thought me the things I wouldn’t know about love, about life.


~o~


Jamie: Mommy, bakit kaya si Mama at Papa, high school pa naging sila, eh hindi parin nagsasawa?

Mommy: Ganun talaga pag mahal mo. Ako nga wala na si Daddy pero hinahanap-hanap ko parin.


Who else would throw these words sincerely? Only mommy can explain how long, lasting love is with not much explanation.


~o~


Jamie: Joshua, tanungin mo nga si mommy kung sino ang paborito niyang apo?


(pumunta si Joshua kay Mommy pagkatapos bumalik…)


Joshua: Ikaw daw po!


(ako naman ang nagtanong kay Mommy)


Jamie: Mommy, sino po ang paborito nyo apo?

Mommy: Si Joshua.


That’s how Mommy is. You know who her favorite is… but she’s at the same time fair to everyone.


Inspiring things I learned from Mommy:



In cross stitching:


“Maganda dba? Mahirap gawin pero maganda.”


In singing:

“Hindi naman importante kung maganda o pangit ang boses mo, ang mahalaga masaya kang kumakanta.”


In being a teacher:
“Dati may studyante ko pinalo ko makulit kasi. Akala nila hindi masakit sa teacher mamalo ng studyante kahit makulit pero ang totoo higit pa sa physical na sakit ang nararamdaman ng teacher.”

In family:

“Kaya ako nag anak ng marami kasi nung bata ako malungkot pala ang mag-isa. Masarap at masaya ang madaming anak at kapamilya”


There’s a lot more that she thought me, there’s even more that I learned from her. I can never write it all, however, it stays and sticks in my mind and heart.

Is there a way she’ll be back? I can trade 10 yrs of my life for another year or even for one more day…


Para sa isa pang araw na makausap siya,

sa isa pang araw na makulit siya,

isa pang araw na maglambing sa kanya,

sa isa pang araw na mayakap siya,

para sa isa pang araw na makalaro siya,

sa isa pang araw na marinig ang himig niya,

para sa isa pang araw na masabi kong mahal ko siya.

Mommy, Inang would be jelous, but I really loved you like her. I actually think that I love you like Inang.



I’m sorry if I never had the chance… but I love you Mommy… always will!

love, now and always,

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Monday, June 15, 2009

The only thing I didn't like about my work...

I love my latest job...

And if I haven't told you yet, I'm currently Vibal's promo writer. It’s still a writing job, nothing’s new, nothing’s changed.

I never thought that I would be able to live and adjust to this kind of life. Actually, the first problem I encountered here is turning my life upside down. I tell you—it’s really 360 degrees of change. From my bum life of waking up—12nn and sleeping at 4am, I now sleep before 10 pm and wake up as early as 5:45am.

Could you believe it? The last time I woke up that early was, when I came back from US 2 yrs ago, because of jet log. Sounding weird, I really never thought that I’m a morning person. All along, I thought my extra powers only comes out when the moon is up, bright and shining.

But now, sunshine’s makes me feel like I am solar powered, bottom to top. Day-by-day, I’m starting to get used to my working life. I save more money now than before. I don’t have enough time shopping. My life now revolves around work and home—I wake up to go to work and go home to have a lil bit of internet, watch TV and sleep. I, honestly say, I do not shop a lot like the old times.

Working killed my social life. I spent the rest of my free time with my family. Of course, I still go out but most of the time it’s with them or I’m just alone, bonding free with myself. Prolly, this is the right time to know myself too… MORE!

There’s nothing that I didn’t like in my life right now. I’m relaxed. I’m happy. I’m single and I’m working.

Maybe, if there’s one thing I didn’t like about my work are the ACCIDENTS. The regular cuts—wounds—bloods.

Do not over react… it’s just a paper cut. Actually, no one sees a paper cuts pain. It’s only felt by its injured individual.

When borrowing books, I often cut myself.
While I turn pages, I accidentally cut myself.

I wonder why paper cut hides under the skin, feels beneath my skin…when, in fact, it’s more painful than a vaccine and a wound.
love, now and always,
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Sunday, July 29, 2007

Meet chimie my car!



I haven't introduce my car to you guys yet...
Well, her name is Chimie (short for kotCHI ni jaMIE). It's a black Suzuki WagonR with pink and white seat cover that I requested. Chimie is a graduation gift of my mom and dad to me... because I completed college without failing grades and imagine, finishing it for just like 3 yrs with by-lines in different newspapers... Don't be amazed! That's a W-O-W!

Here's what it looks like... 







Mine is really like this but she has a skirt (it's dressed up when it's bought!)





love, now and always, 

Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Thoughts...


I wish I could pause everything. I wish I could put my life on hold, just for a second. I wish I freeze my tears for a little while. I wish I could put emotions on layaway until I know how to handle them.


There’s a difference between, “You can’t have it. So the only other choice I have is to close my eyes, and runaway. Bend down to my knees and just pray. Be thankful for what I have this very day. And for everything I’ve been blessed to say. Because all of that brought me to you Depend on no one because in life there’s a road you take. And one day, that road splits in two. At the end of each road is success, or failure. This isn’t a “guessing game,” it’s a, “You’re the only one that can choose your destiny.” By depending on no one, you make your own decision on you’re life. So choose wisely because either way, there’s no one to blame around you.

Why is it that guys are never say they’re scared? Why is it, that deep inside, they’re weaker than girls? But, why do you girls actually admit they‘re afraid? How come guys want to always act tough? Why won’t they let their selves go and why is it that when girls just want to hang out with them, they get annoyed? How come girls mature faster than guys? And why don’t boys ever take anything seriously? Why won’t guys admit they like you? Even if they know you like them… How come guys are so simple? And why is a girl so detailed? Why is it when they kiss, a girl takes an hour to tell the story? When a guy just takes a minute… Are guys afraid a rejection? Because girls are too! And why is it that guys want to lead the pack? Why do they always want to take charge? …The answer is as simple as three words…They're expected to. Crying about things… Will not scare the pain away.

People throw the word, “Love,” around… As if it means nothing… Well newsflash everyone… To me it means something I challenge you… I challenge you to put yourself in my life. I challenge you to fall in love with someone, and to experience getting your heart broken. I challenge you to deal with your emotions when you find out that the love of your life, sees right through you, like some ghost. I challenge you to put yourself in my shoes, just for one day…so that you’ll realize how much I go through the rest of the 364 days of the year. So if you’re up to the challenge, try to do what I do, so that in the end, we’ll see who’s strong.

Her mom didn’t understand Her dad was always at work Siblings lived miles away So naturally she was always hurt She cried herself to sleep each night Convinced herself she was wrong To everyone that didn’t take the time In the end she turned out strong *

Flashback; Turn back in time where you used to sit 4 hours watching the Rugrats. Where you wouldn’t ever leave your house without your nano baby, and when Blues Clues was actually challenging. Rewind back to the times when your favorite shows were Doug, Ren & Stimpy, Pinky and the Brain, AAAAAAAH Real Monsters!, and Rocko’s modern Life. When you watched re-runs of TGIF, Step by Step, Family Matters, Dinosaurs, and Boy Meets World. When you remember reading every series of Goosebumps, or in that case, remember listening to your mom read them as she grew bored and bored and as you grew more excited as to what would happen next. When bringing plastic cartoon lunch boxes to school was pretty much cool, and saying “NOT,” after every sentence was the way to talk. When every argument was settled by rock paper scissors, bubble gum bubble gum in a dish, or daddy had a donkey inky binky bonky. When cops and robbers was a daily activity, and when hide and go seek was put to pause only when it was snack time. The days when we used to actually obey our parents and when the radio was all we depended on for music. When you knew that Kimberly, the pink ranger, and Tommy, the green ranger, were meant to be together. When you always wanted to send in a tape to America's Funniest Home Videos . . . but never taped anything funny…so you gave up. When the Magic School Bus made you think that school buses could fly, and when yo-yos made you popular. When getting married meant buying your crush a Ring Pop, and blabbing some random words behind the dumpster. When reading that little paper in the fortune cookie meant everything to you because it predicted your life. The days when you could tell furbie all your little secrets and expect him to talk back, and when Beanie Babies were the talk of the class. When you got creeped out by "Are You Afraid of the Dark?" And when you knew the Macarena by heart. When you lied to your parents to bring you to McDonalds because you were starving, when really, you wanted to play in the play place. When gas was $0.95 a gallon & Caller ID was a new thing, and when checking out drawing books and "Rainbow Fish" from the library was the cool thing to do. Before we realized all this would eventually disappear we didn’t bother to think of how good things were. Flashback…to the world we live in now.

No school book will ever teach you how to love yourself, no teacher will ever tell you how to heal, and no class can help you learn how to brush yourself off and try again. Life changes on a daily basis. Every minute every hour. Still, we try to save it. And she falls down trying. Yeah she falls down crying. It’s hard to grow up in a society where you will never be the pretty girl. Everyone seems to have everything you don't. & dreams are always one cloud away from where you are. I was flipping through an old school notebook of mine, but I shut it, threw it against the wall, & cried. Every page had a heart scrawled next to the name of a boy who lied. knowing is better than wondering, waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, beats the heck out of never trying "Because things change and friends leave, life doesn't stop for anybody." just because somebody flirts with you, doesn't mean they like you. Just because somebody likes you, doesn't mean they want to go out with you. Just because somebody wants to go out with you, doesn't mean they love you. Just because somebody loves you, doesn't mean they won't hurt you. Because people lie, things change. Boyfriends cheat, best friends ditch. And there are always going to be those people who would kill to see you fall

Zack: OW! Papercut! Kiss it Mr. Moseby?
Mr. Moseby: You can't even see it.
Zack: You can't see a broken heart either, but it still hurts
. -The Suite Life of Zack and Cody

Here's a tip for all the guys; if you don't think she loves you anymore, ask her, you might be wrong. That’s why its called "falling in love" cuz you don't force yourself to fall, you just do.
Most people don't know who they are - that's why they lie. They’re afraid someone else will figure it out before they do. - One tree hill

Live every moment, love every day, `cause before you know it, precious time slips away

It's funny. I didn't even like you all that much, but I find myself missing your arms around me, & the little kisses on my forehead, & just sharing your body heat when we would hug. I miss feeling appreciated & wanted. I miss that little bit of comfort. They sat together, as just friends.

11:11 rolled around; someone yelled, "Make a wish." They wished for each other.

Just because I haven’t talked to you in so long, doesn’t mean I don’t miss you. Anyone can give up. It’s the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that’s true strength. It’s like a routine. I fall for you on Monday. I like you Tuesday-Thursday. You make me mad on Friday. I think about you all weekend. But the second I see you again on Monday, I fall all over again.

"Get over him." yeah okay. Trust me, if I could, I would. It may be hard, and it may seem wrong, but sometimes you have to forget about the guy who forgot about you. It’s so sad. We used to laugh and talk together. Now we pass each other in the hall and don’t even look at each other. Its like were strangers that never met. Love and hate. Two small words that can crush your world. You may not end up where you thought you’d be, but you'll end up right where you’re meant to be.

&& telling everyone we're just friends is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. Sometimes, we expect too much. The key is to just expect nothing. && that one time when you’re not all caught up in thinking about what you want to happen, it will. My head is saying who cares about him, but my heart is saying you do dumb butt I tell everyone that you’re stupid and that you aren’t worth liking. && I hope that if I say it enough, I might believe it. Forgiveness is such a simple word, but it’s so hard to do when you’ve been hurt. You’re single. Make the best of it. It doesn’t mean your not good enough for anyone, it means no one is good enough for you. Smile, let everyone know that today, your alit stronger than you were yesterday.

I'm so sick of immaturity, of name calling, of labels, of gossip, of High school. It doesn't make sense any more. & I find myself being nice to people that I rather kill.

Do you know what it feels like to have everyone know something about you that no one was suppose to know? You give someone a piece of you and all they do is run and tell everyone.

There’s only so many times a girl can be disappointed before she gives up trying. Only so many times a girl can get her heart broken before she gives up loving. Only so many times a girl can get hurt before she starts crying. Some things are just made to happen more than once. She glances in the mirror and throws her hair up, ripped jeans, and an old hoodie. There all she needs. She runs out the door five minutes before class starts, and arrives just as the bell rings. Cheeks flushed. She doesn’t try that hard at school. And she plays sports simply because she likes to run. Her rooms a mess and her cell phones always dead. But she just smiles; she knows the world is hers. She has her enemies, she’s made her mistakes, and she knows it. But she doesn’t care. She’s happy with who she is and who she has, because that’s all she needs.

After a while you realize you need to stop getting mad and just expect the lowest from the people you thought the highest of.

I don’t understand why god would let us meet, if there was no way we could ever be together. ---city of angels.

Have you ever noticed that there’s always that particular line in a song that stands out and reminds you of that one person you can’t forget. So let me get this straight. you were leading me on, using me, keeping me waiting for something that wasn’t there, letting me get my hopes up, acting like you cared, and allowing me to start liking you more and more because you didn’t wanna hurt me? Yea rite "There's no use in crying; it won't change anything." - Drake Stephen

Math is emo; because well no one understands it.

Out of all your lies, I love you was my favorite.

If you want to know where your heart is look where your mind wanders.

You know it's meant to be when even at the times you can't stand him, he's still the only person on your mind.

Nobody takes a picture of something they want to forget.

I'm at a point in my life that if I were underwater, I doubt I'd kick to come to the top Music... easier way out from pain.

& she feels like she was lied to; like that warning in the rearview mirror that says- "Objects are closer than they appear." She thinks she needs a sign taped to her heart- "Caution: Much more broken than I seem."

Don't tell me the sky's the limit, when there's footprints on the moon. Be careful who you tell your problems to, 80% of them don't care, and the other 20% are glad you have them look between the lines, read between the words because the most important things are left unsaid and unheard.

Life is full of secrets and lies, so when you get screwed over don't be surprised.

I’d walk through hell in a gasoline suit; just to see you.

[Stop] pretending like you love me, Stop pretending like you care Stop pretending like I mean something Because you've never been there.

Never play hard to get with a man who's hard to get.

I'm mad at myself, not you. I'm mad for always being nice. Always apologizing for things I didn't do, for getting attached, for making you a huge part of my life, wasting time on you, depending on you, thinking about you, wishing for you, dreaming of you, changing for you. And most of all, for not hating you

I wanted you to fight for me, I wanted you to say that there was no one you'd rather be with, and I wanted you to say that you wanted me. But you don’t always get what you want, do you?

I lied to him; straight to his face. I couldn't bare to tell him that he is the only thing I need and that I love him with all of my heart.

"When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.

I ended up a has been, but I was once an ARE.
I was ridiculed by others because I followed my own star.
I could have been, a might have been, or a would have been by far.
Though I ended up a has been, at least I was once and ARE.

The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet.

Deal with it and move on

OUR friendship may never be perfect, but I hope it would last forever...



love, now and always, 

So Remember Me One Day as Kind

 When I die, I want people to remember me as kind. It hasn’t always been that way. Four years ago, I was a very different person, a wounded...